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The primary way to identify any addictive behavior is to consider whether it is causing negative or unwelcome problems and yet you return to it anyway. If your sexual behaviors have caused consequences to your legal status, relationships, career, health (emotional or physical), yet you continue to engage in those sexual behaviors anyway then there is likely a problem. You know that you are a sex addict if your sexual behaviors take up more time, energy and focus than you would like or if they cause you to act in ways that go against your underlying values and beliefs. Men and women who are sexual addicts will frequently say to themselves, "This is the last time that I am going to..." yet they will find themselves ultimately feeling driven to return to the same sexual situations, despite previous commitments to change.

Sexual addicts are most often unable to make and keep commitments to themselves and others about stopping or changing particular sexual behaviors over the long term and most have problems with real intimacy. They will describe having feelings of overwhelming intensity while approaching the possibility of engaging in their particular sexual behavior and describe this intensity state as "being in the bubble" or "like being in a trance." This intensity/arousal state is typical and helps sexual addicts block out the potential consequences of what they are about to do. Typical sexual addict behaviors include: compulsive use of the Internet, phone lines or personals ads for sex, consistent use of prostitutes, sexual massage or escorts, multiple affairs, frequent sex outside of primary relationships, anonymous sex and compulsive masturbation.