New Yorkers tend to throw fits about wildlife showing up in odd parts of their city. So we're unsurprised to hear that a local man was flustered when a large hawk flew into the restaurant where he was eating last week and perched on his lunch.

It'd be cruel to steal the story away from its hilarious original teller, whose best line was "I turned around to see it standing on my two-piece-with-side-and-soda combo, just chilling and looking out the window wistfully, as though a Sarah McLachlan song were playing in its head."

A phone call to the restaurant confirmed the tale, including the tidbit that a cook, Manoli (in the style of a true superhero, no one at the eatery knew his last name), whom a waitress describes as "pretty fearless," caught the thing in his bare hands when it flew into the kitchen. Said hawk was sent to the vet, who reportedly turned him over to a wildlife refuge.