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image for Gold Medal Chinese Women's Gymnastics Team Disqualified Due To Age
Controversy, as usual, at the Olympics

The Chinese Women's Gymnastics Team took the Olympic Gold Medal in the team competition, but has been disqualified due to the falsification of the ages of some of the team members. News sources had reported several days ago that at least three members of the team had falsified paperwork to appear to be older.

Officials begin to be suspicious when the girls pulled out their teddy bears during a competitive break and begin holding a tea party. They were also curious when one girl had to ask for instructions on hooking her bra and another ask for help wiping herself after using the bathroom (her phrase, loosely translated, was "making poopies"). Another strange moment came when one team reported that, in the locker room, the Chinese gymnasts all had cartoon characters on their panties. Further suspicions were aroused when the athletes asked the American team if "the Jonas Brothers" had cooties.